ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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