If i come over, it means nothing
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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