How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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