I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Randomize