I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
