Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
