Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize