I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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