Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
