idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Randomize
