Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Farmville is her only friend.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
