talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
The feeling are messing with the penis
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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