my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
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Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
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So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight