I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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