if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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