then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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