If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
