I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
so explain again why im purple
no
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
