the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
BRING THE BAGELS
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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