i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Terrible idea I love it
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
