? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Fuck appropriateness.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
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