if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
