it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Hippo gnu deer
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize