I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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