I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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