i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
