A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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