:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize