No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize