no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old