Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
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Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
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my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in