I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a shit load of segways right now
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize