No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
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