I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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