I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
