IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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