i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
