Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Randomize
