Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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