Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Holy shit dude........stairs
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
