Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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