Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Randomize
