so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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