I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Randomize
