it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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