just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
