wanna go halves on a baby?
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
