I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
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