HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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