Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Randomize
