Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
