I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
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He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
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Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I have aggressive nipples.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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