hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize
